Learning about uncomfortable truth here in destination medical center city.  There is a good old boys network.  I know this shocks you, lol.  Not.  While I knew about the GOBN in the community at large, as you only have to look at the Post Bulletin to realize this.  They will only print positive things about Mayo and the Catholic church and all others beware.  Yet, while the GOBN runs rampant in the community in businesses, development, city and county government, I really didn't think it was in high school athletics.  I thought we were so over that, but apparently not.

My son plays soccer and has since he was 3 years old.  He is a natural defender and gosh darn it if he doesn't have natural talent.  He played for Century High School while in middle school.  Yet, this year he is on the C squad.  What happened?  First, he tried out and immediately made JV.  Second, he went to every practice until we went on a vacation, the one we had planned for over a year, and he was bumped almost immediately.  Devastation sums up the remainder summer practice sessions.  No way back to JV?  No.  Heck he didn't even get a full uniform until...wait, he still doesn't have one and they are well into their season.  The capper for me was this:

Aiden and Cullen's mom: Why isn't Paulo on JV?
Me:  I think it is because we went on vacation.  At least that is what the coaches are telling him.
Aiden and Cullen's mom: They need him on JV.  He is a much better player than my boys.
Me: Well, ah...thanks.  Coach says he can work his way back up, but I just don't know.  Things aren't adding up for me...
Cullen and Aiden's mom:  Vacation?  They are playing a boy from Spain and he just got here.  He's on JV and now Cullen and Aiden are getting benched.  Your son should be playing for JV!
Me: Hmm... I guess I will have to explore this some more...

It seems, the word for Century Soccer is that if you are a good soccer player and a kid of color you won't make the JV or V squad.  If you are from the Average White Band, no problem.  Heck you can make V in 9th grade!  If you are a kid of color you must REALLY be GOOD to make JV and you can only make V if you are a senior.  Wow!  Really?  I had no idea.  How can this exist?  Does it really exist? 

Yup.

100 kids from the Average White Band and 8 kids of color and Marcus, a 9th grader from the AWB on V, case and point. 

Talked to the coached and explained my concerns in my best non hover parent voice and said I wanted to discuss how the situation could be remedied.  Unfortunately he only wanted to "set me straight on the facts".  Discrimination never came up.  He said we needed to talk on the phone, now.  I was so ticked off I had to wait until the following week.  No!  He wanted to talk to me that very day, but only to "set me straight on the facts".  Dude, this is no way to talk to someone who has spent 20 years on human rights councils, commissions, and won a discrimination case deep in upper red neck territory.  Again, it is hard to talk tough to people who are unarmed.  I politely said that I didn't need to have him set me straight on the facts,  I knew them.  I am familiar with the facts all too well...

Regroup.

Let's talk to the principal and get this over with.  You know, kind of like pulling off a band aid on a festering wound.  I served on the Core Planning Team for the school district and this is exactly why I participated.  I wanted to give ALL children educational opportunities and that did INCLUDE sports.  No, couldn't talk to him because this is not an ACADEMIC issue.  Okay, I will talk to the athletic director.  Talk about GOBN.  He kept calling me mom.  Honestly.   Man, it is hard to get tough with someone who isn't armed.  He said, "Now isn't this better than emailing?  You get a chance to vent, mom, and this is the best way to advocate for your son."  Are you playing with me?

Nope.

I went for a little bit of the gusto and explained how I felt my son was being discriminated against, he was being singled out, no full uniform and on and on I went.  What did he say?  23 years experience of placing kids on teams, parents, kids and vacation, build a team, and other coaching woes.  He would look into the matter. 

Doubt.

I sent a follow up letter and again, put on my best non hover parent voice in the note.  Something like I hope you will follow up on the matter, yadda, yadda, yadda.  I have retired from the human rights gig.  Tired and lost hope for a while.

Regroup.

Son said the coach yelled at two kids and it was pretty awful. 

Son: He yelled at X and it was terrible.
Me: Why?
Son: I don't know...well, he didn't do what coach wanted.  I think he smarted off too.
Me: (silent)
Son: He yelled at X too, but X held up his phone and told coach he would call his mom if he didn't stop yelling at him.
Me: (angry silent)
Son: What?
Me: All you have to do is record the coach and we can take it from there.
Son: You aren't going to talk to the coach are you?  He will just yell at me next.  I don't want that.
Me: What he is doing isn't good. If it happens again, push record.  Okay?
Son: Okay.
Me: It will be okay.  I am not stupid okay?  You will not get hurt.  These men are trying to break your spirit and you can't let that happen.  This is what happens.  They will never win.  Only you can let them win.

So while the athletic director of the GOBN is "looking into the matter"  I am
Googling how to file a complaint against a coach.  Guess what I found?  Rep. Urdahl's (HS coach, turned politician) Bill to help protect coaches.  Say what?

It's true.

Seems to me that the GOBN here in destination medical center land have had enough protection and now it is extending to the high school.  Man, it starts younger and younger.  Maybe high school is a micro-chasm of the world or at least the community after all.  Something needs to change.  It is time for me to set some things aside and put on my human rights hat again (sigh).